


Their Choice

by xHookedonKillianx



Series: Choices [3]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-27
Updated: 2016-03-27
Packaged: 2018-05-29 08:38:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6367180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xHookedonKillianx/pseuds/xHookedonKillianx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The light is blinding but it feels warm against his skin. From the corner of his eye he sees his brother look upon the light with pure joy, and though it’s beautiful, his heart still feels heavy. They reach the bottom of the steps and he can feel the breeze of the air on his face and the smell of the ocean in his nostrils.</p>
<p>The Jolly sways in the ocean waves as the birds fly over it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Their Choice

**Author's Note:**

> Third and final Installment of Choices. I hope you guys like it, I'm extremely nervous about it. Spoilers for 5x15

Emma was the one that told the group of his decision. He was to move on with his brother and they would go home. He knew they would find a way; he didn’t have to worry about that. Emma never fails and Killian knew she wouldn’t fail at this.

He remembers the room fell silent as she spoke and when she finishes, they all just nod in acceptance. Liam pulls him in for a fierce hug and whispers in his ear about going home.

His brow goes together at that. The only home he has known for the better part of two hundred years has been the Jolly and after that, home was where ever Emma was.

But when his brother steps back, he just smiles and nods. His head hurts from crying and even though Emma used her magic to make them both look less puffy and red; he could still see the tracks on her cheeks the tears left.

“The sooner we go the better, little brother.”

Killian goes stiff at his words. There has to be more time, surly they can come up with more time. No, but they can’t. The more time Emma and his friends stay in the Underworld; the more time it gives Hades to find a way to keep them there until the end of days.

With he and Liam moved on, they will be able to concentrate on just going home.

Regina and Robin approach Killian first and say their goodbyes. Robin gives him a handshake and he tries to hide his complete shock when Regina gives him a short, but meaningful hug.

After they walk away, Snow approaches him. She says nothing but her eyes were shining bright with tears. His throat tightens has she lifts her hands to his face and smiles at him.

“Goodbye, Killian.”

Fresh tears fill his eyes as Snow leans up on her toes, pulls him to her and kisses her forehead. Killian can’t remember much about his mother, she died when he was young. The only memories he has from his childhood are of his brother and father, so he never knew what it was like to have a mother.

But the moment Snow’s lips touch his forehead, he feels like he does. The warmth of her maternal love washes over him and he has to choke back a sob. When he pulls back, a single tear runs down her face but her smile never falters.

“Thank you, milady,” he whispers to her.

Snow’s smile brightens and she gives his arm a squeeze before she walks off. David walks up next. The two men stand there in silence before David sticks his hand out.

“Never thought I would trust a pirate.”

Killian smirks and returns the handshake.

“Never thought I would trust royalty.”

When Killian goes to pull his hand away, David stops him. His brow goes together as he looks up to see him staring at him intently.

“A long time ago, we had a conversation. You told me you would go to the end of the world for your princess.”

His eyes sting and his lips press into a thin line. For Killian, that talk he had with David by the fire was only a year ago, but for the prince, it’s been a lifetime. He had no idea that he even remembered it.

“Do you remember what you said to me when I asked if she would do the same for you?”

Killian clears his throat. “Aye. I said I didn’t know.”

David takes a step forward and places his hand on Killian’s shoulder.

“She came to the end of the world for you, Hook. Never forget that.”

His throat tightens and his chin quivers. Emma did come to the end of the world for him and he was about to leave her forever.

But it was the right thing to do, he died, he should move on and be happy with his brother. He made the decision to do so, but he couldn’t deny the one thought that kept repeating over and over in his head.

_If this is what I’m supposed to do, why does it feel so wrong?_

When he turns, he finds Emma and Liam talking in a corner. He knows things between his brother and his love have been strained, so it surprises him when Liam leans forward and pulls her into his arms.

Emma nods as his brother whispers something to her before they pull apart.

He makes a move to go over to them when he feels a hand slip into his own. Killian looks to see Henry standing next to him. The boys head was down and his shoulders shake slightly.

Before he even realizes what he’s doing, Killian pulls Henry to his chest and wraps his arms around him. The young man, who looks so much like his father, lets out a soft sob and squeezes Killian tighter.

“I’m going to miss you,” he mumbles against him.

Killian chokes and closes his eyes. “I’m going to miss you, too, lad.”

They both stand there with their arms wrapped around each other as each one of them cry silently. He rocks the boy in his arms and when they finally pull apart, he has to force himself to do it.

Killian sniffles and reaches into his pocket. His fingers brush over the key before he pulls it out.

“On my ship, in the Captain’s courters, there is a closet.” He explains as he looks at the key in my hand. “It holds my cutlass. That cutlass has belonged to the only two Captains of that ship. Myself and my brother.”

Henry looks up at him with confusion. Killian takes the key and places it in the young boy’s hand.

“They Jolly is yours now. Take care of her, will you?”

The boy’s eyes go wide at the key.

“You’re giving me your ship?” he asks in a tiny whisper.

Killian puts his hand on Henry’s shoulder. “Find Mr. Smee. He will take good care of her while docked, and once the crew sees that you have my cutlass they won’t argue. They are good men. They will follow you wherever it is you may want to go. You’ll make one hell of a captain, lad. I have no doubt you’ll do me proud.”

With a soft whimper, the boy launches himself forward and wraps his arms around Killian’s waist. Tears continue to run as he holds Henry to him and buries his nose in his hair.

“Look after your mother for me,” Killian asks in a whisper.

Henry nods and wipes his nose with the back of his hand. He gives the boy a kiss on the crown of his head before they both turn to walk over to his mother.

Emma has tears in her eyes when they approach and his chest tightens. If anyone else were to look at her, they would see she was upset but otherwise fine.

But Killian knew the truth. The tears were just the beginning. The way her jaw twitches, the way her hands keep moving at her side, the way her feet shovel under her, they were all signs that told him she was doing everything in her power not to break.

He wants to comfort her, he wants to hold her and tell her that everything was going to be okay, that this was the right decision, but he couldn’t even tell himself that.

Killian doesn’t remember them leaving the house. He thinks words were spoken, but he can’t be sure. It’s like a fog went over his mind and he was just on autopilot.

All he knows is that for some reason, David and Snow go with them. He found it odd, they already said their goodbyes, but he never says anything. He just concentrates on the feel of Emma’s hand in his own.

They all walk slowly, but not as slow as he and Emma. Their steps drag along the ground but the cave appears sooner than they thought possible. He feels her hand start to shake as they walk through the opening and his stomach drops when he sees the edge he’s supposed to walk across.

Snow and David turn to his brother and he starts to panic. Killian spins and pulls Emma into his arms. They both no longer try to hide their tears as the openly sob. He buries his head in her hair and breaths her in.

_This is it. This is the last time I will ever hold her._

He pulls back, his hand finds its way into her hair and he slams his lips onto hers.

Killian has felt pain before, he’s felt lose, when Liam died, he turned pirate. When Milah died, he turned dark, but the thought of losing Emma, of leaving her… the place he was going to guaranteed peace but he couldn’t fathom it, he knows that, but just the _thought_ of losing her, he doesn’t want to be a pirate, he doesn’t want to turn dark, he doesn’t want to _be_ anything.

He just wants _her_.

Killian’s hand grips her hair as they pull apart. Their foreheads touch as they both sob.

“You have to go,” she whispers even though her hands tighten on his jacket.

He tightens his hold. “I’m afraid.”

She shakes her head, tears pouring down her face. “The future’s nothing to be afraid of.”

Killian chokes as she repeats the words he told her not too long ago, when he believed they were about to have the future they always wanted. A future that truly no longer exists.

“We must go, brother.”

His jaw clenches before he slams his lips against Emma’s one last time. He tries to memorize the way they feel and the way they make him feel. When they break apart, Emma lets out another sob.

Killian kisses her forehead and whispers, “I will _always_ be with you.”

She nods as her hands move from his face and down his arms.

He tells himself that’ll he’ll turn right away, that he won’t look at her, it’ll be easier. But as he pulls back, he keeps his eyes right to her.

“When you’re…” he chokes because even though he is about to move on himself, the thought of Emma doing the same still hurts his heart. He doesn’t finish because she just nods, she already knows what he means.

“I will find you,” she whispers. “I will always find you.”

Another sob falls out of his mouth and he takes another step back. When they are forced to let go of their hands due to distance, he chokes while David rushes to stand behind Emma and Snow moves to her side.

In that moment, he knows exactly why they are there. They came because they knew the moment he crossed that bridge, his Swan was going to break.

David stands behind his daughter and wraps his arms around her front while Snow takes a hold of her arm, but Emma keeps her eyes on Killian’s. Tears stream down her face and her chest heaves up and down but her stare never wavers.

“I love you, Emma Swan,” he calls out through his tears.

Her shoulders shake and David leans in to kiss the back of her head.

“I love you, Killian Jones,” she cries.

With his brother’s hand on his shoulder, he finally finds the courage to turn and tries to ignore the sound of Emma’s sob. With each step he takes, he tries to tell himself that he’s doing the right thing, but all that goes through his mind is flashes of Emma.

_Their first dance in the Enchanted Forest, how she looked at him in just pure wonder._

Another step.

_Their first date, how stunning she looked in that pink dress._

Another step.

_When they get out of the story book and her look of pure joy when she finds him upstairs in her room._

Another step.

_How breathtakingly beautiful she was at the ball they attended in Camelot._

Another step.

_Her smile when he told her he loved her in Camelot for the first time after she’s said it._

They are within steps of the staircase before he even realizes it and he wants to look back, everything in his body tells him to look back, but then the white light shines bright.

The light is blinding but it feels warm against his skin. From the corner of his eye he sees his brother look upon the light with pure joy, and though it’s beautiful, his heart still feels heavy. They reach the bottom of the steps and he can feel the breeze of the air on his face and the smell of the ocean in his nostrils.

The Jolly sways in the ocean waves as the birds fly over it.

“She’s beautiful,” he hears Liam whisper.

_Emma is beautiful._

“She’s just as I remember her.”

Killian’s mouth opens as he stares at the ship, but his eyes flick over the ship and into the distance. His brow goes together as he tries to figure out what the shadowy figure is, but it seems too far away.

“Let’s go home, little brother.”

_Home._

The Jolly has been his home for hundreds of years, he’d gladly give up, and has, anything just to stay on her beautiful deck. Nothing has ever come between him and his ship. Except for one…

_Emma._

He traded the Jolly, his ship, his _home_ , the one thing that was his brothers, all for her. Why? Because he loves her. Because she was the reason he did anything anymore. She was the reason life was worth living.

She was the reason he wanted to live. The wind blows causing the sails on the Jolly to flap, which makes the shadowy figure in the distance clear.

It was a beanstalk.

The same beanstalk he and Emma climbed when they first met. The same beanstalk he knows that even if takes that step and moves on, he’ll be sailing toward until Emma is with him again.

He may be happy if he leaves, no, he _will_ be happy if he leaves. He’ll sail the seas with his brother and be at peace. But Emma wouldn’t be there. She wouldn’t be there until she herself moved on, and though he had a funny feeling even if, gods willing, it was years away, it would probably not seem that long to him, he couldn’t see himself being fully at peace.

The choice was Killian’s to make, people were always making decisions for him… Emma… Liam… they told him to make this decision on his own, but he didn’t. They made it for him, because if it was truly his choice, he’d be with Emma.

He would _always_ choose Emma.

Liam puts a foot on the bottom stair but stops when he notices his brother hasn’t moved. Killian does the one thing he told himself that he wouldn’t do, he turns to look back. He lets out a sob at what he sees.

Emma has crumbled to the floor in a fit of tears. Her father cradles her into his chest while her mother holds her face in her hands and tries to sooth her.

“You’re not coming, are you?” Liam whispers.

Killian’s eyes move back to Liam. He’s surprised to find his older brother doesn’t look upset, or angry, but has a small smile on his face, and his choice, not his brothers, or Emma’s, _his_ choice, is finally made.

* * *

 

Emma feels her father wrap his arms around her and she takes a deep breath. She tries to tell herself that she should look away, that it would be easier, but she couldn’t if she tried. Her eyes were blurry from her tears but she engraves the way Killian looks at her in her brain.

“I love you, Emma Swan,” he calls out to her.

She wants to fall to the ground then, her legs tremble, but she refuses to let him see how bad this was affecting her. She couldn’t do that to him. He needs to move on, he deserves to be happy.

“I love you, Killian Jones.”

Liam steps forward and puts his hand on Killian’s shoulder. Her chest goes tight and she doesn’t realize the loud sob that echoes off the wall is her own as he turns to walk across the bridge. With every step he takes my mind races to remember his face.

_The look of pure cockiness he gave her right before their first kiss._

Another step.

_His nervous smile as he told her that he traded the Jolly Roger for her like it was no big deal._

Another step.

_The way his face lit up beautifully after their first date._

Another step.

_His nod and small in Camelot telling her it was okay to light the flame so they could start their future._

Another step.

_And even that adorable little smile he gave her when she pulled him down from the chains Hades had him hanging from when she told him she never listens and he said she was impossible._

Liam and Killian disappear in the white light and Emma’s legs finally give out. With a loud wail, she falls to the floor.

“It’s okay, Emma, sweet heart, it’ll be okay,” Snow whispers to her but she can barely hear her.

Her sobs are loud and her chest hurts. She thought she felt pain the night before, but it was a scratch compared to the pain she was feeling now. She wants to take his ring out of her pocket. He’s been gone for a half a second and she wants to hold it in her hands so that she can see his face again.

Emma told him she would let him go, and she didn’t exactly lie. She just made sure that she had a part of him with her so that if her mind and/or memory went away, she would _always_ remember his face.

Snow moves to hold her hands while she feels her father move his hands up to her face.

“ _Daddy_ ,” Emma wails as she fights to breathe.

David pulls her back to him and kisses her head.

“It’ll be okay, baby,” he whispers into her hair. “It’ll be okay. He’s at peace now.”

Emma’s hands reach up and she holds onto her father’s arms as an anchor. Her life is meaningless, everything is meaningless, the world seems to lose color and she can’t find a reason to move let alone go back home.

“He’s gone,” she sobs. “He’s _really_ gone!”

She’s never going to see Killian Jones again. She’s never going to feel his arms around her, his lips on hers, she’s never going to hear his voice again. She’s never going to be able to tell him she loves him.

Emma’s chest starts to pant heavily and her mother tries to get her to calm down, but she can’t. She’s lost her one True Love and there was nothing she could do to change it.

She’s crying so hard she misses her mother’s gasp and fails to understand why her father’s grip loosens. Her hands tighten on his arms and she wails harder when she feels hands on her wrists again.

The hands pull her and she shakes her head. She doesn’t want to move; she doesn’t want to do anything. Her father’s arms move to push her up and she lets out a sob.

“Open your eyes, love.”

Her hands move to cover her ears as cries. She’s hearing his voice and it’s the worst form of torture that anyone has ever come up with.

“Breathe, Emma,” she hears his voice say. “Look at me, please.”

She feels her father reach up to move her hands away from her ears before he whispers.

“Open your eyes, baby. Look.”

Someone touches her face and her eyes fly open, because she knows that touch. She would know that touch anywhere.

Emma’s sees beautiful blue eyes staring back at her and she sucks in a breath.

“Wh… what?”

Killian stands before her with a beautiful smile on his face and tears in his eyes. Her body falls forward and his arms go around her. She tries to speak but the words get caught in her throat and she just ends up choking on sobs.

_This can’t be real_.

But it _has_ to be real. He’s standing before her, he’s holding her, he’s kissing her face… he feels real… he smells real…

“Killian?!” she chokes out.

His lips are on hers and she knows in that instance that it’s real. He’s standing before her. Her arms wrap around him and she squeezes him close. She doesn’t care if it’s the right thing to do, she doesn’t care if it’s selfish, she’s not letting him go, she can’t.

“I’m here, love,” he whispers against her lips.

She looks up at him in pure shock like he’s about to disappear at any moment.

“I’ve made my choice…”

Her brows go together and her heart starts to pound. “What…”

“You,” he breaths out. “My decision… my choice, it’s you. It’s _always_ you, Emma.”

Before she can speak his lips are back on hers and everything fades away, because Killian is back in her arms, and even though they are stuck in the Underworld, she knows it won’t be long until they are back home.

They break apart and Emma leans her forehead against his. She wants to ask him about his brother, she wants to tell him what he did was stupid, that he was supposed to move on, he was supposed to be at peace, but she just couldn’t.

“You’re my happy ending,” she whispers to him.

His smile is breathtakingly beautiful before she reaches her hand up into his hair and kisses him again.

They’ll tell each other later that it was never really his choice, or her choice, it was  _their_  choice....

And they would always choose each other.


End file.
